Lesson Four

The year between Jennifer's first and second birthday is the year I recall as the "time of the desending darkness" for my family. Jennifer's father was diagnosed with at least two mental illnesses the month I learned I was pregnant with her (February 2001) but he was a loving , functional husband /father until she was almost 1 year old..then he fell into the "If I dont take the prescribed medicine, I'm not really sick" mentality and refused to continue taking medication . Then, the month before she turned one, a well-meaning judge gave him custody of a son he had prior to our marriage. Jennifer's first birthday party was attended by me and the 3 children who lived here and my parents.. he left the house 30 minutes before the party because" he had library books that HAD to be returned than INSTANT." Paternal grandfather REFUSED to attend , paternal grandmother and his sister purposefully came an hour AFTER the scheduled party(Jennifer was asleep by then as it was 8:30pm). That was the last birthday party I planned which included his family. Lesson Four:Not everyone is able to accept and love unconditionally a child who is "different" and this can be extremely hurtful and painful when the individuals who can't "rise" to the challenge are family members.